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Youth Parliament – Lok Sabha: Day 1 LIVEBlog!

The LIVEBlog for Leaders of Tomorrow’s Youth Parliament is now live! Stay tuned.

LiveBlog of the Lok Sabha session conducted by Leaders of Tomorrow as a part of Youth Parliament.

LiveBlog of the Lok Sabha session conducted by Leaders of Tomorrow as a part of Youth Parliament.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:12 pm

Hey there! Welcome to The Post’s official LiveBlog of the Lok Sabha at LoT’s Youth Parliament. And we’re good to go. Blogging with me today is Mukund Poddar.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:28 pm

And now we have a proposition about the Land Requisition and Rehabilitation Bill here on stage.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:29 pm

The chairs have just taken the bill into consideration. Speech by the Prime Minister up next.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:31 pm

Aw Snap! The Prime Minister just gets shut up by the chair. Opening speech only for 60 seconds, chaps.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:32 pm

The nerves are tense here with stutters galore. Flashy tags, dapper formals, and laptop decals, with one very particular Game of Thrones decal on the press team. 

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:33 pm

Do Bigha Zameen 2015.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:34 pm

The real Slim Shady please raise your placard.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:34 pm

Rahul Bansal on the floor, speaking regarding housing. No innuendos there.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:35 pm

Hey! Mukund’s here.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:36 pm

Hey to you too! Technical difficulties finally sorted.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:37 pm

The chair asks speakers to not use personal pronouns. All those in favour, don’t say “I”.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:38 pm

Roti. Kapda. Makaan. Winning elections since 1950.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:39 pm

“Land Acquisition bill will reduce the agricultural land is India”. Food for thought?

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:43 pm

A Youth Parliament is definitely a good starting point to get over stage fright. Kudos to LoT for the event!

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:44 pm

First reading of the bill is over. We hope the “Second Reading” is not taken as literally as some of the members took the first. Ditching the paper=dropping the mic.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:45 pm

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:49 pm

Ah. Land is being discussed and finally someone is taking digs at another.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:50 pm

The speaker explaining the use of Point-of-Orders. “Quote XYZ, and then say it should be ABC”. Starting at the basics again.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:51 pm

Capitalism. Was waiting for that namedrop.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:53 pm

The chairs are banging the table. Totally not weird.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:53 pm

Member of Parliament from New Delhi now speaking. Unfortunately, we may now need to censor quotes.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20156:55 pm

Impedance to the Land Acquisition Bill would prevent the setting up of secret military bases. Give the member 51 points already.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:56 pm

Attention. We cannot find the Minister of External Affairs.

Amit Shah November 7, 20156:59 pm

Leader of Opposition. Throwing mud on the government’s Land bill.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:00 pm

Statistics now make their way into the room.

A great person once said, “There are three types of lies: lies, white lies, and statistics”.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:01 pm

Okay so a speaker actually had to look at his tag to know his designation. What’s in a nametag?

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:01 pm

I’ve never seen the word “Honorable Minister” spoken with such a scowl.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:02 pm

The Prime Minister uses Kutch, Gujarat as an example for development. The apple does not fall far from the tree.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:03 pm

Deputy Leader of Opposition Karishma Agarwal speaking at 450 words/minute. Busta Rhymes got some competition.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:05 pm

Debrup Dutta silently texting near me. Totally not scary.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:09 pm

The Finance Minister Shaurya Lala sets a new bar by being the first to take the stage. He also manages to make sense while at it.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:10 pm

“India is following Land Acquisition Bill 2013, not 1894.” *kicks time machine*

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:10 pm

Finance Minister taking center stage.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:11 pm

“Many farmer people are planning some jobs.” Well, okay.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:12 pm

Table banging drowns out the next speaker. Phew.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:14 pm

Minister’s use of farmer “people” gets mocked by the opposition and he doesn’t get it. The air quotes went over his head.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:15 pm

70% of all statistics are false.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:15 pm

“We are laying the land for a discussion on agriculture”. A single line description of all that has happened in the last hour.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:17 pm

“The GDP is just a number.” Opposition Finance Minister.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:18 pm

“Do we kill people to make our GDP go up?”. Dan Brown is doing a little jig right now on finding out at least one person referenced ‘Inferno’ in the Indian Parliament.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:21 pm

The number of attacks on the bill was so high, the “Government Defence Minister” had to be called upon.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:23 pm

Members of the house seeing their friends bang the desk and deciding that they must too. Don’t ask why.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:23 pm

Anyone using land acquisition rules to stall the setting up of garment industries definitely has “vested” interests.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:25 pm

“Wait wait wait. Don’t, don’t raise your placard.”

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:30 pm

And by the way. Mukund has been my partner in school, partner in tuition, and general heterosexual and separately inclined friend.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:32 pm

The members are so tired of speaking that we seem to be typing faster than they can express.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:33 pm

Is this a good place to reveal to Amit Shah how no one stays so close all the time if he’s platonic?

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:34 pm

“Please start talking about the bill and its clauses.” The chair, bringing speakers back on track.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:35 pm

It is extremely unfortunate when people start dropping middle syllables in words, especially when saying ‘current’ in the parliament.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:35 pm

That focus. And panda decal!

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:36 pm

While people in villages are starving to death, the ministers are busy eating words.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:36 pm

A general “Howdy” to the 2000 odd people tuned in right now!

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:37 pm

These guys would never starve, as long as they have their foot attached to them.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:40 pm

The chairs and photographers seem to be the only ones seeing the bigger picture.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:41 pm

“Development, but at what cost?” The opposition is changing gears from “What development?”

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:42 pm

“Are we reaching such a state when “Industry” and “Development” are bad words?”

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:43 pm

“China’s economy is going down. So is Russia’s. Brazil is combating corruption. India is the only country where people see hope.”

http://www.lmgtfy.com  (Let me google that for you)

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:44 pm

“Can we please have a speaker from the opposition just for variety?” The Finance Minister for you, people.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:45 pm

“Children are dying of malnutrition. India is here and China is way over there. We need to bridge that gap.”

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:47 pm

“Just for variety” is literally what happened. After a 30-second question from the opposition, the ball is back in the government’s court.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:50 pm

“What is your point?” seems to be the catch-phrase trending today. Whatever happened to asking for the number?

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:51 pm

Time’s running short and only one brief question per speaker is allowed.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:53 pm

“Don’t raise your placard, raise your standards.” Theme of the evening.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:53 pm

Multi-crop, mono-crop, and standing crop: the opposition Minister of Agriculture sure knows her topic.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:56 pm

Everybody in Parliament regrets having slept in EVS class.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:58 pm

The major debate seems to revolve around agriculture in India and rural infrastructure. One would assume that the Opposition Minister of Rural Development has some thoughts on the matter, but he seems to be a man of few words.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:58 pm

Chair asks her to speak as she hasn’t spoken the entire evening. She nods.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20157:59 pm

A lot of hurt people in the house right now. The Government Whip is apparently very good at verbal lashings.

Amit Shah November 7, 20157:59 pm

Table bang contest is too hot, hot damn.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:02 pm

Arbgvuir, bvruiabv uilbvb uifanf.

trying to keep up with the Deputy Leader of Opposition’s speech failing miserably

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:03 pm

Roti, Kapda, Makaan. Namedrop, namedrop, namedrop.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:04 pm

“The Opposition wants farmers to always remain farmers.” Their name is Mudd.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:05 pm

Can someone please ask the Deputy PM since when is farmers remaining farmers something bad for the economy?

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:08 pm

“The government seems to expect rape victims to cook for them. Of the people, for the people, by the people? I highly doubt that.” 

This man owns.
Deal with it.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:09 pm

The Godwin’s law in an Indian context would probably state “As a discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving the Delhi Rape Case approaches 1″.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:09 pm

Last speech for today’s session being given by the Prime Minister.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:10 pm

Everyone we were supposed to meet now, hold yourself together. Five minutes more.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:11 pm

Opposition talking merrily throughout the PM’s speech.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:12 pm

Now the chair looks for a motion to adjourn session.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:13 pm

The Prime Minister is done. All conversations will now move from the group to overnight PMs (personal messages).

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:13 pm

And ADJOURNED! Thanks for hanging on, folks. Now the chair speaks his mind on the quality of debate today.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:15 pm

Chair to Finance Minister: You had a lot of points, mostly amendments. But, you gave that to me in chits. That should be your amendment for tomorrow.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:15 pm

The chair owning the speakers.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:18 pm

“Tomorrow report at 8:30am. You’ve paid, so we expect you to come. So don’t get wasted tonight.”

Chair, out.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:18 pm

“Don’t get wasted tonight”. Final message from the chair, to MIT in general.

Amit Shah November 7, 20158:20 pm

Adios, guys. Thanks for sticking around for the first session. Shah, out.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:21 pm

That was a fine day of debating and discussing. It was a lot of fun talking to you guys, and we hope the puns weren’t too cringe-worthy. See you again tomorrow, and till then “Don’t get wasted”!

*over and out*
Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:24 pm

Breaking news: The loudest cheer during the feedback session: “Will there be refreshments tomorrow?” 

Lok Sabha: asking the most pertinent questions since 1950.

Mukund Poddar November 7, 20158:26 pm

Over and out for real now people.

*insert overly-attached girlfriend meme*

Hey, we love you, comprende?

Mukund Poddar November 7, 201510:32 pm

The members are so tired of speaking that we seem to be typing faster than they can deliver.

Not that someone really expects MPs to deliver.