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Youth Parliament ’16 : JCC(ISI)

Afridi Majeed | Staff Writer

Much like the protagonist portrayed in the lyrics of Opeth’s ‘A Fair Judgement’, the members of the ISI wing of the Joint Crisis Committee in Leaders of Tomorrow’s event, Youth Parliament got the chance to live many a Pakistani’s dream. They were to recreate the events of the Kargil war, starting afresh from May 3rd, 1999.

Decisions made during the course of this debate could span through a myriad of outcomes, ranging from the war of Kargil not even taking place, to both countries unleashing their nuclear warheads on each other. Consequently, the valor, prestige, and honor of two countries and not to mention the lives of millions of innocent civilians now lay solely in the hands of the budding young gentlemen who had assembled in the AB-5 classroom that was to represent ISI Headquarters.

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The first update had already been issued on Friday; much like the real Kargil war in which shepherds had been kidnapped, the update informed the room of farmers who had mysteriously disappeared from Kargil. Locals had reported seeing three suspicious men around the time of their disappearance. As the debate commenced upon the arrival of the Executive Board comprising of Dhruv Verma, John Christopher and Rhythm Vijayvargiya, pandemonium instantly unleashed in the ISI room as delegates began to plan out their course of action against India. Some suggested attacking strongholds of the Indian bases whilst others were of the opinion that Pakistan should strengthen its borders and bases.

RAW made the passive-aggressive move of moving its soldiers to Tiger Hill, to which ISI responded by sending interceptors to bomb the soldiers and thus make their intentions known. Soon, innovative directives had been passed such as sending a submarine filled with slaughtered cows and a pig adorning a Pakistan tattoo to India. RAW aptly responded by dropping a bomb bearing the message ‘With love’ on the submarine.

The Joint Secretary of the Intel Bureau, Afridi Majeed, then sent a directive to bomb the Indian cities of Delhi, Bangalore and Mumbai through the Al Qaeda, who were used as a scapegoat by the ISI to do their dirty work for them without getting the Pakistani government involved. This was a planned strategy so that Pakistan could later appeal to the SAARC and the UN that India was attacking it without any provocation from the Pakistan Army.

Pakistan then won over China as an ally with a Sino-Pakistani pact titled ‘Paki-Cheeni Bhai Bhai’ which was the brainchild of the Director General, Hriday Chhabria, in which it was stated that any act of aggression by India against Pakistan would be treated as an act of aggression against China as well.

Things crossed the point of no return when, in the post-lunch session, Pakistan sent two fighter jets carrying nuclear bombs destined for IAF’s base in Srinagar. These jets were, however, intercepted and only one managed to detonate at Tiger Hill.

To end the day’s proceedings, a Plan of Action titled ‘Swachh Bharat Abhiyaan’ was authored by the Director General, Joint Secretary of the Intel Bureau, and the Army Chief. The winners of the war, however, were RAW with their Plan of Action titled ‘2 Kewl 4 Nukes’, a blatant dig at the ISI for being the initiators of the nuclear war.

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